While a plane "Taxi's," is it a "Crew-CAB?"
Why does "Bill-Gates" have so much money? "Toll-Booths!"
Put a "Receipt" on your forehead for a "Receipting-Hairline!"
You are a "Mind-Reader" if you hear jokes "IN-Person!"
I NEVER "Check" with my doctor, I pay him in "Cash!"
What do you get from a "Pampered" cow? "A Dirty-Diaper!"
When I cut or prune, I drink "Prune" Juice or wear "Pantyhose" for "Shear" energy!
Good-Year-Tires? No, my "Tires" gave me a "Few-Good-Years!"
A storm moved in at a golf course. One golfer said, "Look! Cloud-Nine!"
Copyright 2011 Bryan Lee Schooley
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I don't like listening to "Bach," but you can listen to "Chickens" all you want! (Bock, bock, bock!)
The "SKY" is the "LIMIT?" So I have to get in a "Rocket" instead of an "Airplane or Helicopter" to be "Out of this World!"
One stewardess served me a bag of carrots. I told her, "Carrot-Top" is not "Orange," the top of a carrot is "Green!"
My stewardess served me some "Mayo!" That makes her a "Flying-Saucer!"
Sign a Waiver? a) Show them a "No Wake" sign and they won't be a "Waver" anymore!" b) Wave hi to someone making waves!
A Postal worker named Dave said, "Look, I'm David "Letter-man!"
Copyright 2010 Bryan Lee Schooley
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Does an Equal opportunity employer want you to Add, Subtract, Multiply OR Divide?
Does an Equal opportunity employer not like sugar, or just want variety?
Why didn't I think of that? Because your Eye See's not Thinks!
If God is for something at an auction, is that God For Bid?
I didn't sleep a Wink, but I slept when I shut my eyes!
Don't milk a cow, cows don't drink milk!
Copyright 2011 Bryan Schooley
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Why do people think that "Adams-Family" looks and acts weird? Look how old they are, Adam was the First man!
Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Their gold is in the pot at the end of the "Rainbow!"
If you're not "Wise," maybe you fell through the "Wise-Cracks!"
If the shoe "Fits," put it in a corner or "Time-Out!"
To get something "Done." cook it longer!
I'm cold! Well, behave and you won't get "Coal" in your stocking! (Coal'd!)
Copyright 2011 Bryan Schooley
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Even if you cook lamb in a wok, it still isn't "Wok-N-Wool!"
What is "Face-Off?" A) A broken clock! B) "Bug-Spray" for your face!
Blast Off! A "Bug-Spray" helps you have a blast!
Solve your "Parking" problem by going to the beach!
Why on "Earth?" I live IN a house WITH floors!
What is "Click-N-Save?" Click your seat belt and save your/someone's life!
Copyright 2011 Bryan Schooley
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